My Son Graduated High School over a decade ago and I was kind of wondering how are you Guy’s raising Sons dealing In the Age of the “Cornell 7”?
You know the whole drug thing with the Ketamine and the Gang Bang thing, it’s just I can see a young Man perhaps making a very big mistake.
The worst we had to deal with was a little weed and a slutty Goth Girl down the street
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Haven’t gotten that far just yet, but those issues are on the radar. I plan to be pretty blunt about it once he’s old enough to understand.
If there is a slutty goth girl down the street hopefully she’s over 18… that sounds fun.
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Drunk girls and sex been going on forever. We weren’t giving beer to college coeds because we enjoyed their conversation. Knew several who used getting hammered to have sex so they blame the alcohol, not the fact they wanted to screw. Pretty stupid game in the 80’s, can even more easily wreck your boy’s life now. Be brutally honest about it, could be completely consensual but if she changes her mind, he has to be able to prove beyond a doubt that he didn’t do it, there is no guilty until proven innocent in these cases. That’s going to be expensive now matter what.
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I used to go to work at 04:30 inevitablly I would find the window screen out where Goth Girl had let herself in my Sons room the night before.
We had a long talk and I bought a Healthy box of condoms.
It’s one thing to explain the technical aspects of sex, it’s quite another to explain to your Son that if it’s really easy there a good chance She’s bat shit crazy.
It seems the thing now is to say it’s consensual and then come back after you’ve graduated have a Wife and a Career and saying you are a rapist.
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Having good adult male role models in the lives of young men to help these young men understand what it is like and what is expected of them to treat women. That includes watching dad and how he interacts with and treats mom. There is a lot of learned behavior at play during the social and physical maturation of males. In high school and in college, if your sons are interacting with a good circle of friends that are a positive influence for each other, than good things will happen. What also helps, speaking from a personal level, is if a sister was sexually assaulted in college fueled by drugs, and alcohol.
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I Coached Soccer and Football when my Son was Young, so twenty plus years ago about one in five Kids lives in a Home with Mom and Dad.
Perhaps the young men didn’t fully understand the consequences of their actions but all of them knew what they were doing was wrong.
Something a young man might not know is how a woman can change her views.
Text a couple days later: “At the end of the day non [sic] of the sexual stuff was illegal and honestly I really liked being with u.”
Text a couple weeks later: “Let’s be clear that 90% of what happened that night was not consensual. All i remember after that was you giving me ket[amine].”
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There are alot of good female role models that shouldn’t be overlooked. Adults and other students. Alot of girls participating in athletics while getting good grades and staying out of trouble.
Boys would do well to become friends with those girls.
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How about not having sex until they are married? Chose a Christian co-op instead of a frat. It’s not complicated, but neither is it the easy and wide path.
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No way.
People need to be sure they are intimately compatible before signing potentially life-long contracts.
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History and our own eyes show that plan really isn’t working out. It’s really a matter of adjusting priorities.
I see where you’re coming from and I agree, but at some point you have to send these Guys out in to the World and all of these Guy’s were going to Cornell, so…
Part of talking about abstenance with my Son was with the knowledge (on my Part) that, that’s only going to carry you so far.
He’s married now, going on two years, got his degree, making a six figure salary and driving a Company Car. So my job as Dad is complete until Grandkids get here.
We never had as much as a scare, but I was real with him about it.
I’m pretty proud of him, raised him on my own.
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Would you rather your wife be a virgin or one who knows she’s sexually compatible with you because she’s had thirty other guys to compare you to?
I’d rather she know her body, have experience, and have a clean medical record as far as STD’s.
I’m not rejecting a woman, and hopefully she wouldn’t reject me, due to “body count”.
There’s no way to know unless people share that with eachother anyway.
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I have two boys who are still pretty young so I have some time to figure this out. For now, I’m just trying to model the behavior that I want to see from them when they get older. Then, to teach them about morality - and specific to this case - how to stand up and say something if a wrong is taking place. Easier said than done. I know.
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Exactly. At my age I want a woman who knows what she’s doing. Virgin infatuations are for Muslims and men with insecurities.
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Yea, by 10th grade i realized “virginity” had no value except for kids, insecure men, and religious patriarchies, whatever religion it was.
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A woman can “know her body” without having to run a bunch of %icks through it.
There are individual exceptions, but the overall statistics demonstrate that increasing sexual partners is detrimental to women and their relationships with men. That experience comes at the expense of being able to pair bond, increased odds of cheating, increased odds of divorce, increased mental instability and their lower overall happiness. I’ve seen zero evidence that having other men experience your wife before you makes her more compatible in the bedroom. It certainly doesn’t help with intimacy. If one believes that, then a hooker is probably the best option.
Fear of disease and paternity uncertainty are why men are naturally repulsed by promiscuous women. You don’t have to worry about a virgin having STD’s, but there is a strong correlation between the odds of having an STD and the number of intimate partners.
Women generally don’t reject men due to body county. In fact, they often view the ability to have sex with other women as affirmation of desirability based on social status. On the other hand, men are naturally repulsed by larger body counts. These emotions are programmed in our genetics.
So, get a hooker. Feminist shaming tactics such as calling men insecure are not working like they once did. If a woman calls you insecure, then odds are that she’s sending signs to other men that she available to monkey branch.
I’ve been using forums since the early 90’s & can’t find the “quote” icon on this POS message board. 
(Clicked on every icon i could see, too)
I’m glad some folks can.
I’m glad you support virgins having plenty of toys and time to learn thier bodies / themselves, that’s good to hear.
But it’s not nearly the same as having another person in the room to coordinate / communicate / feel emotions with.
Yes, men & women like to know thier partner is desirable to others.
No, women don’t lose the ability to bond with others after multiple relationships. Men don’t, either. But hopefully, they all learn from those relationships and become better partners. Mental instability?! 
No.
Caring about body count is an individual trait. Plenty of men don’t care what hers is and plenty of women don’t care what his is. Except more insecure people and religious institutions do care more.