Wife just stomped out because Ive told her for the 5th time I don’t want to see pictures of what her home town is doing for an Army soldier who died who was from there.
Her whole family has changed their FB profile pics to this guy and she’s tried to show me stuff they are doing for his funeral at least 10 times in the last week. Ive already said at least 5 times I don’t want to see that stuff, don’t want to know how he died, and don’t want the details of his funeral including talking about open or closed casket.
I guess ‘sorry’ I don’t get overjoyed because someone made a 3x5 banner with a basic training photo with a flag in the background…:rolleyes:
I prefer mostly empty gestures of support to any of the antics from the anti war/anti troops crowd. I think you’d have gotten a lot more mileage from a quick peek and a “that’s nice” and then gone back to whatever you were doing. You shouldn’t get so bent because some small town is honoring one of their dead, it’s a sure bet that at least a few are taking it very seriously.
Agreed. I cut my lady a lot of slack when it comes to things like this to cut down the friction. If a guy friend would have done the same, I would have gone off on a completely different direction…heavy on humorous fowl mouth sarcasm.
I rarely give personal advice and then usually when solicited which in this case it implicitly is. I hope you don’t take offense Belmont particularly as I like you. You should be more patient and kind especially towards your wife. For quite a while I’ve been trying to find the best balance between hard and rude on the one extreme and patient and nice on the other and have found, especially where friends and relatives are concerned, that patient and nice works better. I lost the love of my live (not my current wife) because I was a hard-ass which caused me to give this a lot of thought over the years.
I can understand showing respect to a fallen Soldier. But Really a banner I would just show up to pay my respect then move along .No reason to make signs .and what is up with women who don’t get the" I don’t care to see it"
My wife got mad at me because I was not jumping for Joy when my sister in laws daughter started dance and she tried to show me Pictures of her first dance class. I have found Myself saying “thats Good Honey” on some stuff when in fact I could care less just to not have to put up with the BS and hurt feelings She gets over dumb stuff.
We have to keep in mind here that, unlike previous generations, most Americans these days do not have a family member in the service, but they are still eager to appear supportive. When you don’t know really how to do that, or are unfamiliar with more traditional forms of paying respect to the fallen, you end up with some rather silly and sentimental displays. That’s just who we are these days as a culture, but it doesn’t negate the purity of motivation behind it.
In this case, a veteran’s wife and her extended family are trying to do something to show support for a fallen Soldier from their own community. It’s doubtless become an emotional and patriotic thing for them, and by extension, they probably feel like they are honoring the vet in their midst by devoting so much attention to this. I’d try to look past what they are doing to why they are doing it, and take it all in stride with an air of appreciation and at least passing interest. Right, wrong or indifferent, it would be a real shame for something like this to end up driving a wedge between man and wife.
How many times have you showed her pics of GUNS on the internet or builds you want to put together…you know she dont want to see that. And when you wont look at somethin she wants to show YOU then she gets mad.
I was patient. Ive told her 5 times I don’t want this stuff thrown in my face. I was very nice and polite about it. Just said I don’t want to see it. I don’t put stuff in front of her I know she doesn’t like or has no interest in.
Its not that I don’t think what they are doing isn’t nice or thoughtful I just don’t want it shown to me everyday for a week after Ive asked many times not to be shown it.
If it helps, she is only bothering you with this stuff because she “believes” you will be interested and she has an interest in you. Trust me I understand the frustration, my wife “believes” I give a damn about every youtube video or news story that she finds interesting. I of course could not give less of a fuck 99% of the time. But I keep in mind if she didn’t care about me, she wouldn’t try and share the things she finds interesting and the things she “believes” I will find interesting.
If the day comes when she stops wasting your time with stupid shit then your real problems will have just begun. I only ask that she not disturb me when I’m doing something very important and she is pretty good about that. But if I’m only surfing gunbroker and she calls me in to see a news story about a cat that found it’s way home after being lost for X number of years then I simply say “that’s nice” and I go back to gunbroker. Every now and then I will make her come look at some rare SMG that popped up on Sturm. And it’s because I care about her.
I always try and Show some interest in some things she shows me , i hate when I get cut off if you know what I mean:jester: But if you were Nice about it Like you said I bet that is annoying as hell to have it thrown up over and over
Not saying this about anyone in particular, but “We” can be rough around the edges at times, even when we don’t think so, depending on our backgrounds. I find my short, blunt and sarcastic attitude, is almost instinctive, and have to do a mental “pause” before I blurt out something to someone I care about, that I may regret later.
Im pretty shy around people Ive not developed a relationship with but then the gloves come off…
And I didn’t mean to sound like I told her to fuck off or anything. Im a really laid back guy that jokes a lot with people Im familiar with and like ribbing people. We do it back and forth when one of us fucks up with little South Park like comments. Like spilling something Ill say something like herpa derpa derp while she’s cleaning her mess up.
My only thing was I shouldn’t have to say no to ONE thing 5x before she stops, and after talking about it I guess she walked out all huffy because she was embarrassed…she knew Id not want to seen that stuff and realized she’d made a mistake. I mean watch all kinds of country music videos all the time, listen to her talk about Facebook stuff I call the Drama Llama, and I even talked to her family about getting the Patriot Guard out there since the Westboro people were supposed to show up.
We generally get along great and rarely argue over anything…then its sex and we’re all better within 20 minutes.
Oh and she also started bleeding yesterday which was a lightbulb over the head moment. Should have known…
Styer thank you for the advice that I have been thinking about, and no I am not married. All the same relationships are relationships and if I am going to get there . . .
How about this? My wife’s boss tells her something one time, she gets it. I tell her fifteen times, she don’t get it. I don’t understand it. I accept it. I don’t have a choice.
I would just show up to pay my respect then move along .No reason to make signs .and what is up with women who don’t get the" I don’t care to see it"
