Question and Vent session for whoever is interested.
Back story, I have been working at the same Engineering firm for the past 10 years, with the exception of a seven month hiatus back in 2014. I have received outstanding yearly reviews every year that I have been with the company and I have been singled out for praise by more than one of our clients on numerous occasions.
With that said, I found out today that I was skipped over for a promotion to Project Scientist and that the spot was filled by a co-worker who has worked at our company for a shorter time and has a lot less experience then I do.
Needless to say; I was shocked, pissed, and pretty angry when I heard the news. To top it all off, I just had my yearly review this past Tuesday and in it, my boss dropped a hint that I would be getting the promotion.
I have no ill-will to the co-worker who received the promotion; I get along with her and the rest of the people I work with. However, she is a bit of a loud mouth and is constantly going on and on about “fairness” to woman in the workplace. She complains about everything, is the first to say “not me” when we are asked to volunteer or help out on an unfavorable project, and has driven someone to quit and look for another job.
I say all that to say, I am the complete opposite at work. I’m starting to think my easy going attitude and “no problem I’ll help” approach to things is why I ultimately got overlooked for this promotion. A buddy of mine said the squeaky wheel always gets the oil and he ain’t wrong.
Has something like this happened to any of you and how did you handle it? I’m not about to go all F*** you on my boss or anyone at work, but I’m genuinely pissed off about this. So much so that I left work early today and took a personal day tomorrow, something I never do.
It seems from what you say, you have no advancement potential in that firm. Only you can decide what your next move is. As for me, if I do not think I am valued, compensated properly, or treated fairly I change jobs and do not look back.
I can see the problem: You didn’t know about the dead hooker in the bosses trunk, and she did.
Seriously though, what power is she holding over the decision makers?
My strategy in things like this is to simply and frankly talk about it. Not whining and complaining, but asking for a simple explanation of how and why they made that decision when you clearly had the edge in many ways. Sometimes you don’t get a good answer, and sometimes you do. Depending on your demeanor, this can also send a message that they are messing with the wrong person. Sometimes that helps and sometimes it hinders. Judgement call.
This has been my experience as well. If you’re the guy that’s always there to help, you’ll get the shit detail jobs nobody else wants as your primary assignment, and the people you help with their tasks will take full credit for your work. In the end, you’ll bubble down to the bottom of the rankings.
If you stay there, you need to look after yourself. At the end of the day, your co-workers don’t give a shit about your success, so don’t help them achieve theirs any more than is absolutely necessary.
Honestly, though, with 10+ years experience you shouldn’t have much trouble finding a spot somewhere else (and probably with better pay and benefits). Something to think about.
Not knowing your feelings about the job and the company you work for, plus no idea of the company culture, it is hard to suggest to you what your best approach might be in talking to management.
Another thing that I don’t know is whether there was an application and interview process, or was it strictly management choice.
In any case, if I wanted to continue in the company I would want to talk at least one level above the boss who hinted you would be in line for the job. I would explain that I was serious about a career with the company, that based on the accolades I had received thought I was on the right track, and would like to know what shortcomings kept me from getting the promotion so that I could work opn those aspects of my professional competence.
If I had’nt envisioned a long-term career with the company, I’d just keep my yap shut and leave, minimum notice, but be classy until the end of your tenure.
I had a good friend who was a detective, she got passed over because she was kind of housewife looking and the other gal competing for the job wasn’t afraid to put her assets forward, but strategic yawning and stretching.
Sometimes that is the way things happen. Let them know in a nice way you are disappointed, then rock on, or keep quiet, be a good employee worth every penny they pay you then leave.
All depends on how plu&play your skill set is and how many positions there are out there. The economy is about to tip over for the first time in a decade. Make sure your new (and your current position) are truly stable. You don’t want to walk into a LIFO situation.
You have to talk to your boss about why the position wasn’t yours. Don’t be angry about it, but look them in the eye and don’t let them weasel out of the answer. Hold them accountable.
One thing that I talk to new people about is that they need a “Patron Saint”. It may be your boss, it may be someone above them and even in a different command line. You need someone that has real power and the ability to make and if not make, block decisions that will tend to favor you. A Patron Saint is not just some with a highe position, it is someone that makes the company what it is. And Patron Saints get martyred from time to time too- but they are guarnateed and after-life, one where you might get invited too.
As someone with 20 years at one company, you’ve stayed too long with out a clear cut path of what is ahead. Be a franchise player and get treated like one, or find another team to play for. I’m in an odd situation, so I max’d My happiness rather than dollar count. Sometimes that works, sometimes it doesn’t.
Step 1.) Find a new job that pays better, has better benefits, and better advancement opportunities. Once you have an offer go to step #2.
Step 2.) After completing step #1 clean out most of your personal items from your office, and then bring this up with your boss. Don’t beat around the bush either. Tell them you either get promoted and significantly increased pay based on your documented superior performance or you are pursuing a better opportunity elsewhere effective immediately.
Step 3.) Act upon your demands. If they tell you: “no”, or “we’ll see what we can do” call your new employer ask when you can start and get ready for a new job. Take the rest of your vacation at the old job and walk out that day. Stop answering their phone calls, emails, or texts at that point. Particularly if they need your knowledge for the projects you were working on. Screw them.
If they say yes, prepare to move into your new and improved office.
Same thing as why the guy who’s always there when the gal needs help and proven reliable gets Friend Boxed rather than having his faithfulness rewarded.
What I’d consider would be quietly start putting the word out to headhunters, see what offers other companies would make for your skills and experience, kinda “casually leave 'em laying around” for others to “find”… then have a talk with the boss about “I’m getting all these offers from other companies, and while I’d really like to stay here, if I’m going to make a career with growth and advancement out of it I need to be a lot closer to these (show offers) than this (show current status).” (Don’t do this if you’re NOT willing to take one of those Better Offers and relocate if necessary, though.)
The other lesson learned here is, work to the Letter of your employment contract most of the time. By all means throw in a little Value Added every once in a while at crunch-time, but don’t make it everyday–if you give 110% day-in day-out every year like my mother has over four decades at Boeing, all you tell 'em is “I’m an easy mark and a masochist, Insert Big Banana Here and I won’t even insist on the nicety of lube.”
I’d look at all the advice posted to search for a different employer.
A few things I’d keep in mind while doing so:
If you have a contract make sure you’re intimately familiar with it. If there isn’t a clause that covers leaving before the duration is up, find a good contract lawyer to see if there’s been any violations on your employer’s part. I had a co-worker a few years ago do this, he is currently the only person in our company to successfully terminate employment without penalty/being fired.
Review vacation/time off policy. Earlier this year one of the people in my area quit, and ended up paying the company a fairly large sum due to having taken more vacation than he accrued.
Make sure if you are reaching out to headhunters/potential employers you are not using any of your current company’s assets. I’ve seen that end badly as well.
Finally, from what you state it sounds like you were passed over due to having the wrong anatomy. I’ve seen multiple cases of this where I work. If your boss or those up the ladder in charge of promotions tend to be spineless (like my management team) I wouldn’t even bother confronting them for an explanation. Quietly and slowly clear any personal effects from your work area, have termination notices printed (just need to fill in the date and sign), then continue on as usual at work while looking elsewhere outside of work hours. Depending on your employer’s policy and where you are located, some places can fire you simply for looking into possible new employment.
While not in the exact same position as you, I’m in similar. I emphasize with you. Hang in there.
Do your outstanding reviews come with appropriate raises?
They may think you are a better fit where you are, but if thats true, the raises should tell you that (6-8%).
If not, they are blowing smoke, and that would make them a shitty company, and you should form an exit strategy.
Bro- welcome to reality in 2018.
Experiance, loyalty, knowledge, length of service are all now just antiquated ways us old white boys did business in the past.
NOW, requirements are skin color, gender, minority status and in many places, political stance.
I am by far & away a minority at my work, and in almost 10 years there, have NEVER ONCE had a complaint against a black co-worker been dealt with in any manner. Matter of fact, Ive recently been “talked to” about “not getting along with people” and was told “I have a problem with diversity”. I laughed in their faces, ’ said diversity aint the problem, its the saggy pants, backward-hat-wearing parolee’s their bringing in that wok one to three weeks then never come back.
Needles to say- that didnt help none.
The easiest way to get a raise is to change employers. Before you make a decision to do so, cool off a bit and do some research. Making a decision with a hot head can lead to regret.
If you do leave, don’t tell them why. It will only give them feedback on how to improve. A letter of resignation should only state that you are leaving. Never say what a good time you’ve had there or why you are leaving.
One other thought, do you think sugar tits will succeed at the job? If not, wait it out and be positioned to take it.
Several people have suggestions about a power-play to pressure the current employer to reward an ultimatum. What happens if you win this move? Not sure what your corporate culture is like but if they award a raise or promotion after being put on the spot, it might well be the last one there.
Before making demands, you should determine whether you will be content with that. It will take some time to see if it plays out that way. Time is valuable. Companies usually can expect to lose that individual shortly (few years or less) after such a resolution. I wouldn’t expect to be schmoozed a whole lot in that time. That only happens if the issue was truly and only the result of an oversight.
Start looking at what opportunities are open to your talent. Even if you stay where you are, assessing the market is healthy. The slow burn is not especially healthy.
You’ve been there for 10 years. Not common today. How recently have you updated your resume?
I stayed with a company for 16 years and could count on one hand the number of times I looked at mine. I figured if I was doing that, it was probably time to seriously consider leaving. A couple of years ago, it was time; and I did go. I work with better people now.
I think there are a couple things in play here. For one it may very well be that the higher ups wanted to put a woman in that spot to be more PC. The second thing is that nice guys really do finish last.
Personally I would change jobs. Based on my experience, the best way to advance in both position and pay is to change jobs.
