You won’t actually accomplish much, but might as well take the offensive.
Don’t waste time with the kid. Talk directly to Mom, tell her in no uncertain terms that if you SEE the dog being abused AGAIN you will absolutely call the police. Do not let her slant things in the least, make sure you get across to her that you 100% witnessed her son engaging in animal abuse and that this is not a discussion but a first and last warning. It’s up to you if you want to bluff and claim you have recorded cell phone evidence.
This is 50/50 at best. If you stand your ground hard and don’t come across as somebody the son thinks he can screw with, you just might nip this and a bunch of other crap in the bud. After that I would have zero contact as much as possible. Every time they do something wrong, just call it in.
You probably won’t be able to get away with the whole “mind your own business thing.” Somebody will eventually call them in and they will probably guess it’s you so you might as well take the initiative.
I seriously hope the mother doesn’t know your gf works for her.
Shitty problematic neighbors really suck. I’ve done this drill a few times. The lower your threshold of shit you are willing to put up with, the worse it will be. Willing to be that right now this kid has a mindset something along the lines of “I live in MY house” and he believes he has a right to do anything on that property he likes.
Might want to wait until you have some serious video evidence of abuse before doing anything. Video of him actually breaking the law would be very, very useful. Might be worth a $20 webcam that you can set up concealed on your side of the fence that records everything on their side of the fence.
Then you can simply edit clips of animal abuse and other crimes, copy them to your phone and the presumption over everyone involved will be that it is all cell phone video that you just happened to capture.
If you talk to her about this you a F#$%ed for the future. You will set yourself up for failure. I say this because if things go way South on you in this situation you have just created motive. She can take it as a “threat” and you are now the bad guy. Think about worse case, and work from that.
Call all the agencies and let them document it all and take care of it.
This is another thing to consider. After a short time he might have impacted every single neighbor. A collective effort will be far more useful than one guy. Also helps determine who the bad guy really is.
Yep, it’s a huge risk. Generally making contact and trying to fix it is pointless. She knows what the problem is and clearly isn’t willing to do what is necessary to correct it. Anyone trying to make her do her damn job as a parent will actually be viewed as “a problem” in her eyes and will become a “target of focus” for her loser kid.
Like I said, it’s 50/50 at best. In my experience it’s a waste of time and better to start collecting evidence and or taking steps to discourage them quietly. But I’ve seen it work for others.
The big problem is she has bought the house. When I had problems with the house next door and the succession of losers who inhabited it they were all renters. So that means I just had to make things uncomfortable enough for them to leave. That’s actually pretty easy.
Trying to get a problem neighbor who isn’t going anywhere to stop being a problem is a LOT harder. This kid might just live there another 10 years, doesn’t sound like the type to get a job, get his own place, etc.
I think this is the best course. Once you complain to the mother or confront her directly, they will hold you responsible for any sanctions or fines or any times the police show up. Right now the son doesn’t know you exist except as someone who lives behind him. It’s best to keep it that way as long as you can.
I wouldn’t waste your time talking to the mother, then when you have to call the police they will definitely know it was you and even if she’s nice she’s obviously not able to do anything with him.
I don’t know where you live, but especially if your local police department is on the smaller side (say, less then 100 guys) I would go to the police station on a day shift and ask to speak with someone about the situation. I work for a job of about 35 guys and we deal with situations like this fairly often. Unfortunately there is often little we can do to really fix the problem, but going in, in person, will let them see who you are and let them interact with you for a little while to see that you’re not a lunatic or a pain in the ass, but a respectable homeowner who is concerned about a legitimately crazy neighbor. This can’t be done on the phone and in a smaller department word will get around about who you are and what you’re about and who he is.
Lay out your concerns about the random screaming, the yelling at his mother and the animal abuse and ask them for their advice on how to proceed. Dress nicely and if there is a natural time to work in your prior military service (if I recall from other posts you are) do it. Something along the lines of, “I spent x time in x branch and I’ve dealt with some weird things, but there is something really wrong with this guy” would suffice. Not that the extra stuff about you really should matter, but honestly, in the mind of whoever is going to take your complaint its going to add to your credibility and indicate to them that you’re probably not an oversensitive whiner. I wouldn’t mention the checking into them from court records, but I would ask if it would be helpful to try to record any incidents, especially of animal abuse.
After that, if you see him beating the dog or if you hear screaming and banging in the home where you can’t see those are totally legit reasons to call the police and while they may not be able to do anything right away, he may act totally crazy and maybe they’ll be able to or maybe they’ll catch the mother when she’s at the end of her rope for the day and she’ll give them the info they need to do something about it.
You have to document as much as possible have as much paperwork (with report numbers) as possible and when he does something that you can take action on then you can bring it all in as evidence which will help a lot.
After reading all of the replies, I think I’ve got my course of action down.
I can’t really see myself going on stake-outs to “nail” this guy, so I will record things as they inconvenience me or as I’m available. Whoever posted that he doesn’t know I exist right now is correct. I want to keep it that way. The way our properties are laid out, there are 5 other houses that are equidistant from his antics as I am.
I wish there was more I could do to help that dog.
It really is a damn shame that people can no longer work this stuff out without feeling they don’t dare put the police or attorneys into the middle of it at the start. I guess that’s the world we live in now.
I still think a nice, polite conversation with the mother (if you feel you need to protect yourself, record it) is a reasonable first step. Going in and talking the the police about “I don’t know what to do and need your advice” seems solid also.
Intelligence is your ally, I would chat the mother up and become friendly with her to try to better understand what is going on with her son.
Don’t mention her son, let her bring it up, she’s likely desperate to talk to someone about her troubles, especially a man.
Intelligence takes time and investment that you may or may not be willing to put the effort into obtaining. After you better understand what is going on you can make better decisions about next steps.
You might be surprised by what you learn. That is how I would handle this situation.
You can get a wireless webcam for about $20 that you can hide on your property. You probably want to know what’s developing while you aren’t home anyway.
I have not read through all the replies so it may have been mentioned. But you could obtain several videos of him beating the dog if it is a regular occurrence. Then if your local agencies have a text a-tip send it in with his address. Maybe if you are lucky he is to dumb to tell it was you when he sees the video during the discovery. Maybe you will get luck and him and his mom will fight and he will get taken to the pokey. Here you can call 911 and not leave contact info so LE can respond and they will not know who called. His mom may then eventually get tired and evict him. Or if you are lucky he plays dumb with LE and goes to the pokey for that.
Send the video to the local news. They eat that stuff up. It’s happened a few times in my area lately and those guys get death threats and cops real quick.