“The Sun was first to report that the unnamed patient told doctors at Gloucestershire Royal Hospital that he “slipped and fell” on the two-inch-wide artillery shell. 
The media outlet reported that the shell was part of his military memorabilia collection.”
https://www.yahoo.com/news/bomb-squad-called-er-patient-100800683.html
“Slipped and fell”…
Sure. [emoji23]
Rectum? Damn near killed him!
Remember the Seinfeld episode where Kramer tells them to look for the proctologist in a room full of doctors because they have the best stories.
“Million to one shot doc, million to one.”
True story: when I was a paramedic we went to a local university classroom building, a maintenance worker was standing on a chair trying to do something to the lights. The chair was a wooden chair with two vertical wooden posts to hold the back, but the back was broken off. The guy fell backwards onto one of the vertical posts and it went right up his bunghole, work pants and all, about 8 inches. He ended up ok. Man that could have been bad.
The British newspaper Metro reported that procedures to remove objects from patients’ rectums cost the National Health Service (NHS) around £340,000 ($450,000) a year.
Something is definitely wrong if that many folks are putting stuff up their butts…
Figure about 20, 30 people per year in England at that cost… A lot better than in the US. When I worked in the ED, we’d see one… every 2 or 3 weeks? Just in our ED. It’s an epidemic.
He should have hit the forward assist.
K. Rittenhouse
Wonder if there is something to it if that many people are doing it?
Sticking stuff up there give me super powers or something?
Yeah when I was in the FD OH the stuff you respond to can be insane
The ER nurses said it happens way more than you think !
There butt for the grace of God go us all.
Gives a new meaning to ‘this bomb ass’ lol
Attacked from the rear by enema forces.
Hilariously, if this guy had just admitted he was doing butt stuff it probably never would have made the paper. His absurd cover story is what makes it so funny…
The flashlight was on a chair and I didn’t see it when I sat down.
Butt seriously, that was a real stinker of a pun… 
Maybe this will keep him from upgrading to 105mm.
Anything’s a dildo, if you’re brave enough.
What was the guy wearing when he was, violated? Jeans and Polo are one thing. Something frilly…. That’s another direction…
I had a friend in College that went to sit on a chair, completely missed it and lodged a Coors light bottle deep inside the “NO SUNSHINE STATE”. Stiched up the whole deal, never lived it down.
PB