Like alot of folks here, I carry daily. Glock 19 in a Supertuck for the curious.
There are few who know in my personal life but most don’t and I like to keep it that way. Those who know also know this. But for the first time this past weekend, I was outted by a good friend to someone I’d rather not have known. I played it off until that specific person was out of earshot then let my friend know how I felt.
I was far from happy. I’d managed to keep concealed the entire day, swimming and cooking out. Then the subject comes up of guns. Friend asks me something to the effect of “don’t you carry one of those?” while looking at me.
I say, “maybe, maybe not”. But it’s too late. Waterhead that I didn’t particularly care for wouldn’t leave it alone. I lifted my shirt and he shut up. But the deed had been done.
So yeah. I had a talk with my friend later and need to remind the other two that know.
Same boat as GotM4, but that doesn’t mean that some gun people aren’t idiots sometimes and don’t say things they shouldn’t.
When I was in college I was introduced to a Scottish guy at a party, and his date was my brother’s ex and since my brother and I lived together she new that I had guns and carry. She decided it would be fun to play “attack the conservative” now that she had her pale blue friend to back her up, and so she told him that I had guns, carried, etc. Of course, argument on politics ensues.
Fast forward a few days and I find out that this guy wound up robbing my credit union at gunpoint not 30 minutes after I had left. Stupid coincidence, but I often wonder if I had been there and he had recognized me in line if he wouldn’t have just shot me on sight for fear that I might be carrying and shoot him.
Talk with your motormouth friend, obviously, but frankly shit like this happens. You can’t always predict what someone else is going to think is good for public consumption, especially in the under-30 crowd. Just because another guy is a “gun guy” doesn’t mean he understands what’s public and what’s private. Try having kids and trying to explain to them why they don’t talk to friends about your guns.
That’s sort of the problem too.
“waterhead” is part of the “I play Call of Duty, so I know stuff” crowd. He’s not the kind of person I want anywhere near me with a gun. >:(
I have had a similar experience. The majority of my friends have CCW’s, however for most of them the novelty of wearing a gun has worn off. Most don’t carry daily or even weekly. Unfortunately, within a group of my friends I am known as the “gun guy”. Not that the label is unwarranted, but I would prefer that fewer people knew about me exercising my right to carry a weapon concealed. I covet my privacy dearly and so inherently I would rather people know less about what I am doing, where I am doing it and how I plan to do it. Ironically that includes my inner circle of friends and family who know me best.
Never had an experience like that. Never been “outed” or “made.” I don’t have any non-gun friendly friends that I am aware of.
In my daily carry, I try not to let my kids know. With them running all over the house, sometimes it’s hard to get a piece of quiet and privacy to “mount up.” Don’t need a five year old saying, “Daddy’s got a gun!” anywhere out in public.
My grandmother once outed me to a Western Sizzlin’ full of people when we met my other grandparents in there during one of my visits. “He’s got that stupid gun on again!” said with all the tact and reservation one can expect from an 80 year old woman who has never been forced in her life to zip it. Oddly enough during the same trip I thought I was going to have to kill a couple of urban youths as she went to J.C. Penny’s and paid for some clothing by whipping out a massive roll of money that was instantly noticed by every scumbag in the place.
When I told her not to flash that kind of cash she replied, in her own sweet way, that those insert N word here spoken at an uncomfortably loud volume weren’t going to do anything. I felt the anger from the urban youths who heard this and all I could see was the headline the next morning of “Four urban youths killed after racist comment.” I’ve actually watched her argue with a judge that she was completely in the right when she hit a guy as she attempted to merge onto a road with incoming traffic because “He should have been going faster.” The judge tried for fifteen agonizing minutes to explain to her that she was, in fact, in the wrong. At the end of the 15 minutes he looked at me with this exasperated expression…as if I could make any difference in this situation. She remains convinced to this day that she was judged to be at fault just because the male cop and male judge took the male driver’s side over a woman.
So yes, I’ve been outed. It’s impossible for family not to know. Few of my non-gun friends know I carry at all and never know that I’m actually packing heat at a particular moment. (I carry all the time, but they don’t know that) I don’t really talk about it much with non-gun people because frankly most non-gun people just don’t get it. When I do talk about it, generally it is because somebody is interested in finding out more and someone directs them to me since I know about “gun stuff”.
Small kids are good for outing you. When my oldest was ~4 or so, he made an indiscreet comment in line at Walmart. My other kids have each done something similiar…once. They can be taught.
Much more easily than in-laws. My mother in law is fond of asking questions at odd times and has no concept of PERSEC. While in a vegas casino last month, my brother in law asked me aloud, “so how is it that you can carry your gun in here?” My wife handled that even more swiftly and decisively than I could.
In my house, preps of all types are not discussed with outside people. That includes mil and LE friends, except for a very few in the inner-sanctum. Our public safety affiliations are also need-to-know only. Whether folks are mil/LE, or gun people, or just super people, doesn’t matter. I can’t always expect them to uphold the same standard of discretion that I prefer to apply.
If an in-law persists on continuing the conversation politely ask for a “little discretion” and “privacy” to continue. At which point you can highlight the legality of CCW and the stupidity of his/her public comments as they regard to a CONCEALED weapon.
I don’t have kids but if I did I’d make sure they weren’t privy to that information until they were old enough to handle it and if they somehow figured it out than they would learn the above lesson quickly.
The elderly get special dispensation but even my anti-gun preacher father-in-law knows when to bite his tongue.
Family knows. In-laws don’t (and I’d love to keep it that way). Enlightened friends (i.e. more than acquaintances, like-minded) know. I’m comfortable with all of the above…those who know aren’t stupid.
My son isn’t yet at the age of comprehension, I haven’t yet decided how to handle that but I’ve got some time to think about it.
My older sister has to be one of the worst, even after having been told to keep her trap shut about it several times.
So much so that the wife and I avoid going to public events with her because she just can’t keep her mouth shut about the fact that I carry daily. It’s like a badge of honor for her to tell everyone around how “stupid and paranoid” I am for carrying a gun all the time. I just can’t seem to get it thru her head that the less people who know, the better. I sold her husband a shotgun about 8 years ago and I hear about THAT every time I see her too. Strange being we grew up in the same household that was very pro-gun, but to each their own… my wife and I just avoid her in public situations.
Did get “caught” by a smart old lady once though at Wal-Mart. She was a cashier, probably in her late 60’s and had to walk past me to get to her station. I was pretty well pinned in a corner as I was moving groceries onto the little conveyor and as she walked past me, she put her hands on my waist to let me know she was behind me. She felt the heel of the gun in my IWB and said something cute like “Oh, hello there” and just winked at me as she got behind the counter. Smart old bird. Knew it was there, saw the “oh shit” look on my face and she played if off as if nothing had happened. Learned a lesson that day… regardless of if they appear dangerous or not, they still might get a little too close to your gun. Glad it was a nice old lady.
I have not been outed in public, but I have noticed a few random individuals who were packing and I didn’t say anything. Some people’s overall look just screams CCW.
This. My youngest boy likes to tell folks that “My Daddy has a lot of guns.” :eek:
“so how is it that you can carry your gun in here?”
Ah, my favorite dipshit question. I work security at a mega church and am authorized to carry by the church (as it is illegal in Ohio for CCW’s to carry in a church). While it is a secret that certain members of the security team carry a gun, some people still know and when given the chance like to confront me on whether or not I have a gun on me. Like the OP stated, they generally never let it go.
It can be a fun game, and gets easier with practice. Much like playing “find the fed/FAM” in airports.
Thanks to improvements in cell cam quality, I’ve been building a collection of what-not-to-do pics of indiscreetly armed folks.
Like most other things with kids, what you expose them to and the extent of that exposure depends on them. Some kids can handle it, some can’t. If you have multiple children, you may find the need to involve them differently or give them different information, even at the same ages. Handle it well, and not only will kids be discreet, they can be a big help to you as well.
One of the more interesting aspects of your CCW will come if you choose to carry in posted or non-permissive environments and the kids realize it. Up to that point, you will probably have taught them to be good citizens, follow rules, honor and respect the property of others, etc. When they realize that you don’t, they will ask questions.
My kids are more interested in my badge than my gun. They’re usually in my room while I’m getting ready for work in the morning but I make them leave before I put on my gun. Out of sight out of mind. They’re 5 and 6 now so they don’t really do it anymore but they’ve told a few random people at the grocery store that their daddy is a policeman. Once out of the store I tell them that people don’t really need to know that. They’ve never mentioned my gun.
Close friends and family pretty much know that I carry all the time but it never really comes up and they definitely don’t mention it in public.
Many Moons ago while working at a local bar as a bouncer. The people who worked there knew that I and a friend carry. One day before work started one of the bar tenders wanted too know if I was carrying. This was summer. I had on an open shirt. I pulled my shirt for him too look. He saw nothing. He was surprised. I never did tell him where my Colt 1911 was.