Well, my wife served me divorce papers today and part of the petition says the following:
Guns and Other Deadly Weapons: Petitioner/Respondent agrees not to possess, store, or use deadly weapons in the residence, place of visititation, or any other location in the children’s presence of the following weapons including rifles, pistols, machine pistols, machine guns…etc. Or other deadly weapons. The only exception to this rule is the use of them in a professionally supervised gun range once the children reach the age of 10, and are accompanied by a parent.
I own a handgun but it is NOT with me here. I left it with my father in Texas when I was moved to California. Now that I live in Washington State, I intend on getting it back AND I intend on purchasing a Daniel Defense XV SOON.
I’ve never been violent nor charged with ANYTHING. Only thing on my record is a SINGLE speeding ticket over 20 years ago. I’ve never threatened NOR committed any physical violence to my wife or children. I don’t drink, smoke, or do any kind of drugs.
Is this little provision going to give me problems? Anyone have similar divorce provisions? Was it difficult to work with?
FYI, I haven’t spoken to my lawyer yet as I was acting in good faith believing my wife wanted to work on things. Instead she has manipulated a lot and NEVER had any intention on working on our marriage. She even had me served my divorce papers at what I was led to believe was going to be our first JOINT marriage therapy session.
x2 on the lawyer up. Sign nothing, say nothing. Unless there’s some legal reason you can’t possess, they can’t make that stipulation in the paperwork. If you need a good family law guy in King County (not sure where you are), I can set you up.
It almost sounds as if you got hit with some kind of restraining order…and if so that WILL screw with your ability to buy and own guns. It is almost like having a conviction for domestic violence and all without ever being convicted of anything or having the chance to defend yourself from the charges.
Agree with the lawyer up part, your wife just told you that you are late to the game.
I’m sorry to hear this is happening to you, hopefully the relationship you have with your child/children will not be tarnished by this unfortunate event.
Ack! Guess I got off easy. My first wife just inflated the value of my guns so she could walk with a bigger chunk O’ assets.
I didn’t have much money at the time and bought what I could afford in lawyer. It cost me dearly. If I coulda done one thing different I’d have taken out a loan or something to have bought a better lawyer. Seriously. My ex-wife walked with 20% of the debt and 80% of the assets and it was her that was screwing around on me! Spend more than you can afford on a lawyer, it’ll save you money in the long run.
'course leaving me was the kindest thing she ever did, wife #2 is so much better in every way I can think of. . . I am SO much happier. Hope your divorce story ends like mine & you heed the advice to lawyer up NOW so it doesn’t start like mine.
I lived in your neck of the woods and a similar thing happened to me, though I wasn’t hit with the gun stuff. As I understand it, this is something that happens quite often post-Lautenberg Amendment and it happens more and more because of some misguided lawyers believe that the husband is going to be violent. Your wife may have even indicated as much which is what led to this.
As everyone has already pointed out you need to get counsel quickly and have this gun issue addressed ASAP.
The OP said the language was in a divorce petition. That is absolutely not a restraining order and doesn’t have anything to do with one’s ability to buy and own guns in general. Without knowing the facts and players, it’s quite possible that this is just boilerplate the wife’s attorney puts in all divorce petitions.
As everyone has said, get a lawyer and go from there. If this is the worst thing that happens during your divorce experience, count yourself lucky.
i believe this is what lawyers like to call “leverage,” and if you even entertain the absurdity it’ll quickly become a “bargaining chip.” don’t give them any more chips than they already have.
There are definitely NO guns in your future! All your money is going to go to the BEST lawyer you can buy. Mine is an outrageous $320 an hour but he has saved my ass more than once. So far I am 3-0 with him over the last 11 years. Hopefully you don’t have any children with her. If you do then you will be dealing with her shit for a VERY long time.
With you living in a different state than me I really can’t comment about the “language” however try to find out if it is standard language to the typical divorce decree? That what really matters as that is what you will be signing in the end.
Hopefully you have hid all your other stuff with trusted friends and cleaned out the bank accounts as well as canceled all the joint charge cards. If you haven’t she probably went shopping and drained the savings.
Realize just one thing and that is this is going to SUCk big time and it has now become war and you have to have your game face on. While it hurts and I promise the pain will eventually go away you have no time to bleed as they say. She and her attorney will play to the fact you’re a nice guy and take full advantage of you. It’s hard to be a prick at times like this but realize this advice comes from many guys whom have stood where you are now.
One other thing you need to know going into this is the court doesn’t give a shit about what’s right and wrong. Divorce is a business!
I’m just noting the language. I used to work in security clearance where certain words and phrases had very specific meanings and implications. I also have seen wives and lawyers do some fucked up shit to guys who did nothing to deserve it.
Yes, sorry to hear of your troubles. You have been provided with some excellent advice. Because of my vocation, I know MANY guys that have gone through a divorce or 2-3. There are many fine women in the world, but also some very vindictive ones as well. The saying “Hell Hath no Furry Like a Woman Scorned” comes to mind.
I know a great family law attorney, unfortunately he is in California. There are lawyers who specialize in helping men insure their rights as a father are not lost and that their right to see and be involved in the lives of their children is not compromised. Contact you local Legal Clinic, they may be able to provide you with some references. Also, you could also try the internet as well. Google “Family Law, fathers rights”, etc.
One thing I will say is to be extremely careful what statements you make to your spouse. Hire a good attorney and let them handle it.
Best of Luck,
SkiDevil
P.S. Definitely hire an attorney as soon as possible, but also find a qualified one as well. Hire someone who specializes in this area. Get the best one that you can afford it may save you some major headaches further down the road.
What my wife stated in the petition was in fact typical posturing to begin negotiations from the extremes with a desired outcome in the middle. We’ve had a really long talk and we’re come to agreements on just about every potential contentious point. Now we just need our lawyers to look over counter offers and finalize our divorce with very little problems.
Truth be told, we both agreed to tell our lawyers to stand down on the posturing and maneuvering and that she and I are in agreement.